Gym crèche bitches

TI love my gym

And if it wasn't for its crèche facility I wouldn't go at all to tell you the truth. The crèche is the key to me being able to go everyday without having to rely on husband.

So I battled at first with taking Ollie because he was so young but it's also another reason why I take him now - he's in that easy stage where he just eats sleeps and poos so now is my Window of opportunity to try to lose as much as I can before the teething and constant need for entertainment sets in and before I have to go back to work - he doesn't know any different and it's for 1 hour tops.

So yesterday I was testing him out on a 10.30am class but I made the mistake of forgetting his dodo aka dummy which he doesn't always take away but helps to settle him and he was a bit grumpy when I got there but these were my words to the crèche carers. ....

I forgot his do do I'm so sorry but if you push him in the pram for a bit he might go to sleep - if not then you can feed him as he's due in about 45mins and if all else fails just come and get me

So they say no problem and off I go to my pump class

So imagine my surprise when I got back and they were like glaring at me - rocking my upset child in his pram they then proceeded to bully me into feeling bad by saying perhaps I shouldn't do classes and that he's always like this (which he's not I seriously have an angel child) so I say did you feed him?

Ah no they didn't - hello then he's fucking hungry which is reasonable to assume he's going to be upset if you don't feed him !!

I was furious

So I had a little rant to my cousin (who goes to the same gym and uses the same crèche) and after calming down I even found myself defending them as she wants me to give feedback to the gym, and my fear of confrontation.

My dilemma is a selfish one.  I don't want to screw with the woman who look after my kids so that I can still go to the gym - what if they are mean to them because I got them In trouble ? Who will know?  they are in a room separate to the gym it's not got cameras so how would I know -

So although I promised my cousin I would write an email and I rarely go back on promises I want to give them a second chance and if they piss me off again then that's it I'll unleash but for now I choose to avoid them lol

Podgy burning machine

Since my last depressing post about my big fat failure I'm happy to say I'm back!! Back in the podgy burning game - the head space is switched on and I've somehow managed to burn nearly 2kgs in 2 days !! This brings me back to my original loss weight of 103.1kgs and it's like the failure never happened lol (it's okay I'm not in denial I owned my failure)

So how have I done this you say ? Well I have literally worked my ass off and have eaten very little - Monday I had a protein day but still walked for an hour and did rpm - rpm is what switched the trigger in my head to get me back in the game.
Yesterday I did combat, went out for lunch but only had a salad then did another hour walk in the evening and didn't end up having dinner - I seriously wasn't hungry though so no point wasting calories right ;)

My goal is to get to the 100kgs mark before my dirty anniversary weekend away which is in exactly 10 days so I'm super focused on this and feel like it's achievable

From then on ...well watch this space

My big fat fail

I was in the best head space -like I'm talking, walking and going to the gym and keeping to 1200 calories eating healthy and wanting too - my every though was how I could lose more, exercise more and then BOOM

I got sick

Like really sick, most sick I've been in a long long time

And since then my head space has turned to shit and I cannot get it back!!

It was like I was being tested and I failed big time

So it's been two weeks since I was sick and today (which just happens to be a monday of course) I'm starting again

Starting again after eating all the badness you could think off, this included a Chinese this included hungry jacks and even a KFC t- countless mindless snacking on anything I could get my hands on and very minimum exercise

On the bright side I did do some exercise still and I did throw in a few healthy meals and snacks but I'm pretty sure the bad out weighed the good

I haven't yet weighed myself I'm too scared of the damage I've done - I was 103.7 I think

I'll go weigh myself right now even though I've had a coffee it's time to take accountability

Okay it's bad I'm basically back to where I started 105.2 I'm such an idiot

Ive given myself a minute to kick myself and feel sorry for myself but there is no point dwelling on what's been done I have to move forward I have to try again I cannot and will not stay at this weight for the rest of my life

New plan - protein day today and I'm taking my boys to the park for a walk and to feed the Ducks and if my husband gets home in time I'll go to the gym later on today - not buying any more crap for this house my boys will just have to go without

Here I go again